Low End Rip- Look out, Dollar Tree!

I still haven't bought any 2012 product from the Topps company-I almost bought some Heritage, but something about Evan Longoria's half-smiling mug on the front of the pack threw me off. Maybe I'll just go with a blaster sometime. Or Archives. Hmm.
  To satisfy the urge to rip some wax, I went to what is probably the lowest-end spot you could go. I am referring of course to the Dollar Tree, that exquisite establishment that, besides baseball cards, hawks 1/2 rolls of duct tape and would-be bestselling books from 2007.

  All for a dollar, or so the sign says.

The purchases: One 2011 S2 pack (of 5 cards)
3 Presstine card packs (20 cards per pack)

  Some don't like Presstine-I kind of do. It has junk wax, but also some cool sets like T205 etc, and at least a few good players in a pack. Let's see what's in these suckers. I used that last word on purpose. (That's called foreshadowing, kids, write it down.)

Pack 1:
1995 UD Collector's Choice Dennis Martinez (Wahoo?)
1990 Fleer Dale Murphy (There it is!)

blah x3...Sabo, Jeff Nelson, Bill Dawley...
2004 Fleer Tradition Stand outs Mark Texeira...Wasn't expecting that!

blah x3...Brad Havens, Keith Miller, Alex Trevino (who???)
1991 Upper Deck Greg Vaughn
1990 Upper Deck Alejandro Pena
2000 Upper Deck Legends Juan Gonzalez (Not expecting that either! Shiny...)
1990 Donruss George Bell
blah x3...Rod Nichols Rey Quinones Carlos Quintana...
2001 Fleer Greats Luis Aparicio (Cool)
2003 Topps T205 Ismael Castro (A Mariner. Fitting to close out the pack)

Pack 2:
2001 Fleer Chart Toppers Steve Sparks (Sounds like a certain Rescue Hero)
2000 Bowman Rookie Card...of Kurt Ainsworth. Huh.

blah x3...Righetti, Greenwell, Erik Hanson...
2009 Allen and Ginter Rich Harden. Nice! Definitely not expecting to pull an A&G card, much less one that was a blogger profile pic for Nathan of Canadian Cardboard!

2003 Victory Solid Hits Vladimir Guerrero
blah x4: Phil Bradley, Jeff Huson, Byrn Smith, Larry Owen
1991 Fisher Price/Donruss Jack McDowell
blah x3: Gullickson, Clay Parker, Lou Whitaker
2000 Topps Finest (Woo!) Vladimir Guerrero (Quite the Vlady pack)

1991 Score 1st Round Draft Pick Expos-Shane Andrews (Nooo...Wrong '91 draft pick!)
1990 Score Pat Combs (This is the weirdest card border/design I have ever seen I think. Wow.)

2003 Topps T205 Bryan P. Bullington (The P stands for Pirate. As in, the Pirates got Pirated by taking Brian Bullington over ***whatever great player was drafted in 2002/3***)

Pack 3:
1991 Score Melido Perez
1994 Ultra Dave Weathers
1991 Score Dave Lapoint
1995 Fleer Carl Everett
2004 Fleer Tradition Robb Quinlan
1991 Fleer Rick Cerone
1991 Fisher Price/Donruss Jack McDowell-Wow, in two packs I get two of the exact same card. Well.

1990 Upper Deck Scott Fletcher
1991 Donruss Rickey Henderson (Free us from the torment of this junk wax, Rickey!)
1993 Topps Draft Pick Jim Rosenbohm
1990 Fleer Gene Larkin
1991 Fleer Jesse Barfield (Blecchh...I threw up.)
1991 Donruss Francisco Oliveras
2004 Fleer Tradition Chipper Jones (At long last! A Chipper! Success!)

2000 Topps Terry Steinbach (He played for Minnesota? Coulda fooled me)
1987 Topps Candy Maldonado
1991 Upper Deck Steve Buechele
2008 Documentary Minnesota Twins Game 49 (Wow.)
1985 Topps Danny Ozark Manager/Giants Team Card

I listed the whole entire pack to give an idea of how crash-and-burn it was. Aside from the Chipper, it was pretty gruesome, unless you happen to be a 1991 junk-wax-aholic, or perhaps a Giants fan. Oh well; two out of three wasn't bad. For three bucks and change, it was less than a gallon of gas. The Chipper made it all worth it, I think. Oh yeah-I also got a 2011 Topps pack with nothing worth mentioning of the 5 cards in the pack. (Read: Mets)

That's that-I'll try to get another low-rip post again; I think I may avoid the $1 Tree next time.